Saturday 29 November 2014

Heanor Haulage STILL Here ... and Asda's Extension

Fed up, hardly slept last night - Mr Grumpy gave in and got up before 4.00am - and H-effin-H have been here since before 8.00am with their crane and railway tracks ... again.

Along with Asda's chuffin deliveries and extension being built - and their appalling night time customers and twatting revving up car park racers - I'm ready to go live in a tent somewhere up a mountain ... as long as it's got central heating and a big bath.

Gawd knows what it'll be like when they start clearing up Heanor Haulage's crap and building the new 'dwellings' and access to them. And we still don't know what is going to happen to the HH land on the front.

Hopefully whatever they do, will be done next summer when we can escape, too bad for the other Bridge Street residents ...

On a happier note - for Langley Mill - after the success of the summer festival on Cromford Road, they're holding something similar - Cromford Road Christmas Festival - on Saturday 6th December when the road is closed between 4-9pm. I look forward to it ...

Thursday 27 November 2014

Black Friday in Middle England

Can anyone explain why nearly every email I'm getting this week is offering me 'Black Friday' DAILY deals?? I thought for Black Friday we had to have thanksgiving first.

And seeing as we're NOT having thanksgiving - being English (ok, British) last time I checked - I have to wonder why this is yet another commercial bandwagon we've jumped on.

And I've checked the 'deals' I'm interested in and they're the same price as last time I looked. With the quoted pre-sale price being a week in the middle of summer when I wouldn't have bought any of the items anyway ... I do believe I'm having a déjà vu moment ...

Wednesday 26 November 2014

One Way Traffic?

We've just received our parish magazine, and it appears that our illustrious local council has submitted comments at AVBC - on the proposed extra 58 rabbit hutches, oops dwellings (along with the 60 already passed) - for a recommendation of a one way traffic system, using Bridge Street AND Dean Street - ahhh, bless, they'll have to be disturbed - to relieve traffic issues.

Well, they won't take any notice of my comments - they never do - so fingers crossed they WILL take notice of our parish council ...

Thursday 20 November 2014

Blue Plates for Little Dinners


A friend on Facebook commented on a photo I shared - of my dinner at Wetherspoons - that blue plates can be used as an appetite suppressant. It must be noted that I rarely manage to eat all my Wetherspoons dinner, even though it's my first meal of the day and I'm proper hungry by the time it arrives around 2.00pm. There's no real problem there though as I have my very own grumpy dustbin with me and he always helps me out.

Of course I had to have a look at these appetite suppressant claims for myself - well I asked Google ... as you do. Hmmmm, It extends far beyond the plates. Decor is involved too.

My dining room is predominantly yellow/gold with only a smattering of blue/green/orange - oops - and my plates are of a similar hue - oops again. I will have to fetch out my royal blue - with gold stars - Christmas table cloth earlier than usual ... that'll be tomorrow then.

McDonalds - aka McCrap - are playing with our noshing senses by using yellow and red lighting. Even I'm not impervious to the warm glow emanating from the McLitter corner of Langley Mill ... no I don't go in and order anything, but I've noticed by the time I get home that I'm actually dribbling ;)

And if you're a fridge raider, it's recommended that you use a blue light in there ... or simply cover the bulb with the blue chocolate wrapper in your hand.

Fortunately I only go in my fridge when it needs filling or emptying, and isn't the sort of place I'd look for a snack ... on the other hand, the inside of my nut cupboard is gleaming white ... and filled with red (chocolate) tins and orange (Jacobs) cracker boxes where my nut stash is held captive ...

Wednesday 12 November 2014

Charity Phone Calls

I'm afraid the British Red Cross has just lost out on a donation. I've had loads of crap from them through the letter box - odd Christmas cards, couple of robin coasters, a calendar, pen etc - so I was prepared to do my duty of an online donation ... when I was ready.

Yesterday evening I received a  phone call from them virtually demanding £15 a month by direct debit. I told the pushy 'saleswoman' that I already give to charities of my choice and I'm not setting up a direct debit to donate £15 a month to any one charity.

She switched down a notch telling me about how with training, someone had saved the life of a two month old ... this was after the hard sell of Ebola. And would I donate a little less than £15 a month. I just said "goodbye".

I already give £15 by direct debit to various charities every month and usually - if I'm feeling flush or a particular sad Sri Lankan dog or cat needs my pennies - I donate £20 to Dogstar. I WON'T be made to feel guilty by cold callers and their hard sell methods.

So British Red Cross - you're getting bugger all now. I've now given your prospective share to Dogstar Foundation!

Anyway I think charities have had quite enough out of me lately. I regularly send lots of clothes to their shops. And they've done especially well this week because some dope took the wrong bags - I was swapping summer for winter clothes in my wardrobe - I could hardly sleep last night after going in the shop yesterday and spotting some of my clothes, although I didn't see my lovely brand new skirt with the £39.50 price tag still on it! ...

Tuesday 11 November 2014

Glad To Be Back :(

Monday:

H-effin-H have been playing with two cranes, numerous lorries and railway tracks across from us since 8.30 this morning - and they were still at it gone 6.30pm.

It was pointed out by my neighbour that HH waited for me to come home, ha di ha ha :(

Tuesday:

HeanorHaulage clearly hate me, they've been bringing the railway tracks back since 7.30am.

So much for council rules on what they can do on that land and at what time of the day - ie "everything indoors and only between 8.30-18.00".

Deliberately being away for my birthday - and bonfire night - meant that I didn't have to phone 999 when Mr HH and his minion set fire to things. Why he should think bonfire night provides him with a licence to burn old containers etc, behind us I don't know.

On a more positive note, Asda have closed in their loading dock so the lights no longer shine in my bedroom and - so far - they haven't woken me with night time deliveries. I bet that doesn't last.

Wednesday:

Asda clearly hate me. Work is being done on their warehouse extension, which involves enormous amounts of reverse bleep-bloody-bleeping. This is very reminiscent of when they built the damn place only four years ago.

Oh and now their gardener is doing what he does best - using his blower to blow the crap back off the pavement and back on to Asda's, ahem garden ... obviously we have lots of McDonalds plants growing there.

Thursday:

Escaped after being woken by bleep-bloody-bleep before 8.00am.

Friday:

Really fed up of Asda and their new extension being built. The 'cherry picker' is none stop bleep-bloody-bleep. this is whether it goes up, down, left, right, backwards or effin forwards. Every day this week from before 8.00am. I can cope better with their drilling and hammering.

And now H-effin-H are here with their crane AGAIN for the third time. Not sure if the railway tracks are coming or going as the lorries aren't here yet (8.00) and I may have missed them yesterday.

Won't it be fun when H-effin-H build the 120ish new houses behind and next to us ... and extending our little street to serve them all? I'm really looking forward to that ...

Sunday 9 November 2014

Last Trip Home

I hate today. I've got to put everything away and wigwam the furniture - this includes the bed I'm still in, and not wanting to get out of.

All this has to be done around a frantically yowling cat - who is also still in bed yet - I'd put her outside in her carrier but it's too cold and damp for her old bones.

Then we've got to splodge through wet muddy grass to the car - which is parked miles away near the gas tank, with bags and bags and bags of important stuff that I can't live without.

Fingers crossed the car is ok this time. The last few years it's thrown a wobbly for our last trip home. First it wasn't firing on all cylinders and we were really struggling to get going after every junction ... 0-60 in 10 mins.

Then two years ago we'd packed the car, went for a last look at the sea and his window wouldn't go back up.

It was getting dark, pouring with rain, and the AA man - who couldn't fix it - drained the battery and we had to stay another day - I had to unload the car - again splodging through wet muddy grass while the window had a plastic bag taped over it.

Thankfully the on-site boys got us going next morning with jump leads from the tractor and the window was - temporarily - fixed at a local garage.

Mr Grumpy was NOT his usual happy self and I was in meltdown because we'd got a wedding to go to and my dress still didn't fit ...

Sunday 2 November 2014

How Now Black Cow

Anyone who knows my grumpy old man, knows that he likes to keep me happy. This includes agreeing with me at every opportunity ... I think this is due to his previous good training as it's not actually one of my requirements. And because of how I word things - being somewhat evil and enjoying watching him cogitate - he often gets it wrong.

I can practically hear the cogs trundling around until he hits on what he thinks is the correct answer ... "Yes!" he'll say - eventually - "No" I'll reply because I'd worded it back to front ... "I meant no, it just came out as yes". And then we'd giggle like the recycled teenagers we are.

However, his worst faux pas are always when he doesn't give himself time to think, his brain must see green lights pinging on and out he comes with his answer ... just like this morning.

We'd been to Gibraltar Point yesterday with my 'bells and whistles' camera to take photos of bods (birds), seals, black sheep, trees, fungi and owt else I spot, whilst also teaching himself to use my old camera ... I mostly find photos of my ar*e when we get back, I really must make him walk in front of me.

Anyway, I woke up itching this morning and discovered two mosquito (whatever) bites on my legs, even though I'd been wearing black leggings.

"Hmmmm - scratch, scratch - the little ba***rds must have thought I was a black cow" ... and quick as a flash he replied ... "yes they must".

So there we have it, I now know that my husband thinks I look like a cow in leggings ...